My first born is two!
And it started.
People, even strangers commenting on the “terrible twos.”
Something feels so wrong about calling a stage of life “terrible,” naming God’s gift, a curse.
Sugar coating aside…
Yes, toddlers are truly exhausting. Hysterical tears for no reason, fits of rage, deliberate disobedience, they don’t know how to share nor do they want to, the list goes on.
But still, even after the insanely hard and stressful days, given the choice I will ALWAYS choose this chaotic life of mothering a toddler.
Toddlers are amazing. They are a lump of clay waiting to be shaped and we get to be a part of that journey. They learn so quickly, are amazed by so much and see things we’d never notice.
The world may only see my two year old, as a toddler-sized monster with a shriek that pierces and an unhinged hulk-like anger when things don’t go her way.
But I see His creation filled with beautiful life. She moves her little body to music, grin growing while the beat takes over. Her knees bend and she springs into the air just a few inches but she’s proud because she’s been working on that jump.
When she throws her head back to laugh, those curls she got from her momma dance on her neck and a sweet sweet sound fills the room.
I see a beautiful gift from the Lord.
I see an opportunity to be stripped of self as I handle each outburst and disobedient act. I see Him using the life of this two year old to refine me.
To remind me that I too am a rebellious toddler, choosing to do things my own way no matter the consequence. I question His rule and authority and make my own decisions. I too, feel angry when things don’t go my way, when people don’t fit into my mold and do what I want them to do.
The heart is deceitful above all things, and desperately sick; who can understand it?
And like a toddler, my heart is corrupt and my deepest desire is to please self. Never, would Jesus name me terrible, even when I act so.
For while we were still weak, at the right time Christ died for the ungodly. For one will scarcely die for a righteous person—though perhaps for a good person one would dare even to die— but God shows his love for us in that while we were still sinners, Christ died for us. Since, therefore, we have now been justified by his blood, much more shall we be saved by him from the wrath of God.
He gently leads me back to His safe arms.
As I continually mother this toddler, Jesus is fathering me and calling us to Himself. Calling us to a life of freedom and hope only experienced in Him.
I can’t call the twos terrible, because I see them as precious.
Precious time that is passing, time that can never be unticked. Every day that begins with new breath filling her lungs, is another day that I am proud and blessed to be her mother. Both growing closer to Jesus, together.
Whether it be the toddler years or the teenage years, I will fight to savor the moments of His goodness.
I will breathe in deep, beg the Lord for grace and guidance. I will remember that He calls them blessings and I will love these children with everything that I’ve got.
Behold, children are a heritage from the Lord,
the fruit of the womb a reward.
Like arrows in the hand of a warrior
are the children of one’s youth.
Blessed is the man
who fills his quiver with them!
He shall not be put to shame
when he speaks with his enemies in the gate.