The Good and the Bad of Marriage


He who finds a wife finds a good thing
    and obtains favor from the Lord.

Proverbs 18:22

“The Bible declares that marriage is a good and holy estate. Marriage is the deepest most profound of all human relationships. Marriage is the only human relationship that includes a spiritual and physical unity of a man and a woman. Marriage is more than communion; it is a union in which two people mysteriously become one. The world declares that marriage is a difficult and temporary estate. The world says that marriage is for “a while.” The world says marriage partners are disposable. It is not that the world has only recently said these things. Throughout history the world has derided marriage.

The world is correct. Marriage is a difficult estate. Marriage has always been a difficult relationship. But that is not the end of it, for the Christian marriage holds out the hope of the deepest human joy a man and woman can drink. Though marriage can be difficult, it could also be a good and holy estate.

What the world has missed is that marriage is a spiritual enterprise. Marriage was established by God. And God said that marriage would be a good thing. Yet, because the fall of our sinful nature’s constantly puts stress and strain on our marriages. We are weak people married to weak people and the closer we become to one another’s he more our weaknesses become visible to each other. Tiny hairline cracks and fractures appear. Without maintenance the estate of marriage can crumble.
The secret of a happy, fulfilling marriage is found in the approach. The world approaches marriage to see “what can I get” from the marriage: my needs, my wants, my desires, my plans, my hopes, my dreams, my ambitions, my expectations. The Christian approaches marriage to see “how I can serve” my partner: her needs, her wants, her desires, her plans, his hopes, his dreams, his ambitions, his expectations.
The problem of marriage is solved by the surrender of one’s individual (selfish?) aspirations to the greater good of the couple. Something must give, and it should be you. To require your spouse to give against the grain of the New Testament love. The New Testament love is giving love, not getting love. Our Lord Jesus gave himself once and for all as a sacrifice for our sins. Have you made a sacrifice lately for your mate?”

Taken From:

Devotions for Couples by Patrick M. Morley

(Pages 22-23)

One thought on “The Good and the Bad of Marriage

  1. This is really interesting! I am working through The Love Dare book and blogging about it on my site and my dare today is about selfishness so this fit right in!

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